Guest Post – 20 Years From Now
My brain’s well of interesting topics to discuss has temporarily run dry. I could blather on about something stupid, or make a list of things that are pissing me off right now, but instead I put out a call for a guest post for today. As usual, my awesome friend Jenn came to the rescue. She normally writes here about her beautiful daughter, her self-proclaimed geek hubby Bil and other topics she feels strongly about. She’s funny, sweet, an amazing mom and a super smart lady. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I did.
I’m taking a break from being a shit disturber over at my site today to completely ruin and trash Jenna’s site. Because she’s awesome like that and lets me hide out here and stick my head in the sand. *La la la! I can’t hear you.*
It’s not that I want to stir the pot. I just always seem to end up on the ‘other’ side of discussions. Maybe I am just argumentative (am not. are too. am not – Oh, yeah, and I talk to myself. I blame my mother).
Speaking of blaming parents… I always like to hypothesize about what my kid will blame me for 20 years from now. Will I have done too much? Not enough? Will it be the toy I didn’t buy for her. The party I didn’t let her go to. The boyfriend that I insisted was a loser until she realized that I’m right (and don’t we all hate it when our parents are right? I’m in my 30′s and it still pisses me off)
I’m not delusional enough to think I’m going to do everything right and she’s going to love me when she’s 14. Partly because I don’t plan on letting her smoke, drink, and do drugs at that age. So there goes my mom coolness factor right out the window.
And you know what? I’m pretty OK with that fact.
I hope I can teach her to be independent and have her own thoughts and not follow the crowd. And I hope that when she doesn’t agree with me, she says so (respectfully…ha!), and we can have a dialog about why she just needs to do what I say anyway.
Most of all though, I hope I can teach her to be happy. Because there seem to be a lot of people in this world who struggle with that. Who, when they do find themselves in a good situation or a loving relationship, think they aren’t worth it and do everything they can to subconsciously undermine it.
I want her to know that she’s wonderful, and smart, and beautiful. And I hope she never doubts for a moment that she’s all this and more.
If I can do that, then I don’t care if she blames me for what ever trivial things will come up. Because, I’ll be able to look at her and know I’m an awesome mom.
9 Responses to Guest Post – 20 Years From Now
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My son is 8 yrs old getting ready to be 9, and the funny thing it, we’ve had this discussion with him. That there is going to be one day where we won’t let him do something “cool” and he’s gonna spew nasty words, tell me hates me, and get over it. He says “no way mom, never gonna happen & if it does you have my permission to spank me) lol. I myself know that day will come, I just pray the same as you, that he and I will get through those moments unscathed, that he will always be the loving, outgoing, happy child that he is. You have to live life to enjoy it, not worry about anything anyone else says or does. Just be you and be happy.
PrincessJenn Reply:
October 1st, 2009 at 12:46 pm
Now that is smart. Start prepping him now for hating you later. Very cunning tactic. I might just have to borrow that.
.-= PrincessJenn´s last blog ..The Voice of Unpopular Opinion =-.
You’re not a shit disturber Jenn. You’re just not afraid to share your opinion. It’s admirable
My 3yo is already very strong willed and opinionated and I’m sure I’ll be blamed for everything in a few years. I too hope I do a good enough job between now and then to give her fierce confidence and independence. Low self esteem is a recipe for disaster.
.-= Karen´s last blog ..I Wasn’t Raped Once. =-.
PrincessJenn Reply:
October 1st, 2009 at 12:49 pm
You’re so right. Low self esteem (especially in girls) seems to spiral down into some many other problems. Eating disorders, abuse, teen pregnancy, the list goes on. But the media sure likes to make it an uphill battle, sometimes, to give our kids the positive self image that they need.
.-= PrincessJenn´s last blog ..The Voice of Unpopular Opinion =-.
That’s awesome. I know too, because my mom was all those things for me. We weren’t best friends when I was 13 and she wasn’t letting me be my true self by getting my nose peirced. Can you beleive she didn’t love the real me? HA.
I was always able to talk to her though, and she respected me in a way, even if she disagreed. You are an awesome mom already BTW. *MUAH*
.-= Lu ~ @masmom´s last blog ..The days after the funeral and cleaning out my parent’s house. =-.
PrincessJenn Reply:
October 1st, 2009 at 12:50 pm
Bwahahaha… I wanted a nose ring too. Sooo bad. I just finally got it done this year.
I’m sure there are going to be times that I’d much rather have a kid who respected me rather than liked me.
.-= PrincessJenn´s last blog ..The Voice of Unpopular Opinion =-.
Jenn, I love this post. Also? I agree…I hope I can teach this stuff too my kids.
.-= Issa´s last blog ..For each of you: =-.
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